Back in 2010 I wrote these thoughts about Hannah (her story can be found in I Samuel in the Bible) and about myself. While living in Illinois, in 1989, I had intently poured out my heart to God, without reserve, regarding the longing which had seemingly, somehow turned into a need. I found great courage in her story. I hope you will too.
YOU HEARD ME, Hannah Remembered
IN FULL ABANDONMENT, I FALL ON MY KNEES.
MY HEART NO LONGER PROTECTED, I RELINQUISH ALL CONTROL-
I SEEK YOU, I BEG YOU, I RISK ALL,
I THROW MYSELF AT YOUR FEET ,
I CRY OUT IN TOTAL DESPERATION.
IN MY LAMENT I TELL YOU ALL MY DISAPPOINTMENT.
I POUR OUT MY EVERY LONGING,
EVERY EMPTY FEELING,
EVERY WOUNDING.
I REMIND YOU OF YOUR POWER TO ENCOMPASS ALL MY NEEDS,
DIDN’T YOU PLACE THEM HERE WITHIN ME?
I AM EXHAUSTED, MY HAIR WET FROM SOAKING TEARS,
I HAVE NOTHING…
I FEEL FOOLISH, IN MY DISPLAY OF GRIEF AND PAIN
AND YET…
I HAVE NOTHING TO LOSE IN LETTING YOU SEE MY UNCLOTHED SOUL,
IT LIES BEAR NOW BEFORE YOU.
I LEAVE AT YOUR FEET, ALL..
ALL NEED, ALL DESIRE, AND I BEG YOU, DO SOMETHING!
TAKE IT ALL AWAY, DO WITH IT AS YOU WILL.
I CARE NOT HOW,
I CAN BEAR IT NO LONGER.
I KNOW YOU KNOW ME,
I KNOW YOU LOVE ME.
WITH HOPE AND ABANDON, I WAIT
ON YOUR FEET I LEAVE IT.
I LEAVE IT ALL ON YOU.
I WAIT…….ON YOU.
YOU HEARD ME!
YOU HAVE PULLED ME EVER SO GENTLY TO YOUR SIDE
AND THE DANCE I FEEL IN MY SPIRIT, I CAN BARELY CONTAIN.
I FEEL LIGHT AS A FEATHER.
MY JOY SEEMS TO KNOW NO BOUNDS.
MY FEET HARDLY TOUCH THE GROUND.
I GIGGLE AND LAUGH.
MY CHATTERING TO YOU IS CONSTANT.
I HAVE KNOWN YOUR LOVE,
KNEW YOU MUST LOVE ME,
YET NOW I WILL NEVER BE THE SAME.
YOU HAVE MET MY NEED
OH YES AND MY DESIRES.
YOU HAVE GIVEN OUT OF THE DEPTHS OF WHO YOU ARE.
YOU SHOWER ME WITH ABUNDANCE
YOU HAVEN’T LEFT MY SIDE.
LIKE A PRINCESS YOU HAVE SWEPT ME OFF THE FLOOR
LIKE A PRINCESS ALL EYES ARE ON ME NOW-
AND I LOOK TO YOU MY RESCUER, MY HERO.
MY HEART IS FULL.
I BOW IN HUMBLED ADMIRATION,
YOU THE LIFTER OF MY SOUL
THE SOLID STEADFAST ONE.
THERE IS NONE LIKE YOU.
I WILL SING OF YOU FOREVER
AND ALL WILL KNOW YOU AS MY FAITHFUL ONE.
FOR I ASKED,
AND YOU HEARD.
(by:Melanie LeDoux 9/2010)